the members page in wordpress is ugly, how to tweak it.

Hello folks

I need a little bit of assistance here -
I set up the ultimate facebook plugin, and it's working famously - to get my users authenticated to use the affiliates plugin.

1 - i asked it to replace the wordpress login, but it still shows it - with log in with facebook as a button, is there a way to switch off the wordpress login ability unless you know the wp-admin link?

2 - once logged in, people land on the back-end of the site as expected. i am rather partial to it not saying "wordpress 3.8.1 is available, please notify the site administrator" (implied - so the lazy git can do their job...), and giving them a lot of updates on the latest posts and such. how do i customize that page they land on - or even better, how do i only give them access to either browse the site, or see their affiliate page?

what funky plugins work for these members, so the site is pretty and customized beyond the wordpress 3.8 pick your colours option?

thanks so much.